Ho,Ho,Ho, Ho-rmonal (not me)!!!

Greetings Girls.  Here's a little pre-Xmas laugh for all those of you who care to read! If you're hormonal - my Xmas present to you is this advice - DON'T GO XMAS SHOPPING !!! I am lucky (!) as this time around I am not yet mid cycle, therefore I'm having a bit of peace from any fiends (until next week maybe, but what the hell - that's then, this is now, so I'll skip over that bridge when I come to it!) Anyways, I went Christmas shopping for an hour today and before I had to go and pick up my son from school. I had a little plan - a few shops and a few things and I would stick to my list and with no diversions. Did I? YES  I DID !!! Wahey!. No fiends were biting at my ass today. No baby!! Not me, nor mine! I had a little laugh (Okay, a laugh at the expense of others - a little selfish I know, but what the hell - sure makes a change for ME to feel 'free' as opposed to a day out in Hormoneville!) I was looking around (whilst in the Q to pay for my shiny new purchases of course) at the many women in the shop, who just like me, were doing their bit for Christmas - and I had a thought.........I thought 'I betcha - JUST BETCHA, a few of them were feeling the hormone pinch!!'  You know THAT feeling when you're shopping and just NOT 'feeling' it (cos your hormonal !!!) ......and your thoughts are all over the place, and your thinking "Right, I could get so and so a pair pf these pj's .....hmmmmm .... she's a small right? A small or a medium? Or is she a large - she did seem a bit fatter/thinner last time I saw her? Would she like the pink? ooohhh..errm..or maybe the blue? Oh for gods sake F*** this, I'll come back another time when I'm in the mood!!!" 

BOO!

Well, Well, Well.  Talk about 'speaking too soon'.  Just when I thought I was having  a free run - whaddya  know,  a fiend came and bit me right on the ass, and hissed "Na Na Na -Ya thought wrong!"

Yeah - so here I am, feeling somewhat rattled cos I can feel the little suckers jumping up 'n' down inside me and having a ball! It's just been one of those days - well, the day itself hasn't been THAT bad as such, but you know the type where you just find yourself feeling tense and agitated for no reason at all. Oh, except there IS a reason  - I'm due on my P.  And if I know my body as well as I think I do - it's coming early (hence the visit from the fiends and the 'Hormoneville'  bus parked up outside). Anyway, and before today kicked off -  for the first month in a good few, I physically feel like crap. C.r.a.p. Capital C.  My mojo's gone walkies. Both my boobs are swollen and sore (and not just the LEFT one as would normally be) my face resembles something from Domino's pizza, my hair - wot the hell - Halloween ended last week, and here I am with a witch like greasy-limp-rats-tails type do. I feel ever so tired, ever so sluggish, ever so this and ever so that - and have I ever felt this bad? You kiddin? Yeah -course I have, but not for ages anyway.  On the plus side though (!) mentally and emotionally - so far, it's all good. My mind is 'quiet', my emotion's 'quieter' and I don't feel the need to let loose any crocodile tears - not tonight anyway (and if all goes according to plan and I get rid of the little suckers as intended  - then there wont be any tomorrow either).  My day - I had a 'to do' list as long as my arm (book a hair appointment, buy my little boy a new school coat), a few places to go (bathroom and tile shops) and a few people to see (mother, grandmother) and as far as I knew (last night anyway!) I was going to Do, Go, See, all of it - today.  Did I?  The hell I did. I just couldn't be bothered doing a thing. Well tell a lie - I did actually go on the visits and also managed to go to look at baths and sinks for our planned new bathroom, but even that started to irate me until I told the hubby "just pick any one of the stupid things cos they all look the bloody same".  Cue coffee and a couple of deep breaths. 

Thank God for Little Boys!

HA! IF ...just IF ..any little Hormone Fiends had any intention at all today of coming my way - my little boy sure saw the suckers comin and scuppered any plans they had of invading my body or mind (or whatever it was they had planned for me up their dirty sleeves). I woke this morning, a lovely cold sunny day, and before they even had a chance to dive in, my little boy said something to me that sent them all packing - big time:

"Mummy............ "I Thank God for U"

If your'e asking "Did he?? Awwww....No Way!?" - Yes he honestly did, and yeah I was lost for words. For a 5 year old to say that - MY 5 year old.....well.......I wanted to cry. It took me a good few minutes to respond to him cos I was absolutely blown away. I cant even begin to explain how I felt - but never before have I felt so much love for another human being (and a little one at that!)but it was all good..... and there was nothing or nobody that could have made me feel otherwise.  And definitely not a load of the little Fiend Fuckers.

Drama? What Drama....

Well, would ya believe it! Day 14. Mid month. Mid cycle. All Quiet.......!? 
If  "Don't speak too soon" is anything to go by then I'd better shut up. Normally around this time, the gates of Hormoneville are wide open and waiting to welcome my monthly mate. The fiends (that are MY hormones) would be hangin off said gates screamin and  "YO Woman! Wait till you see what we've got in store for ya this month, lets get the parrrty starrrted!" - then there it would all start, and as always, to the (goddamn)
LEFT !! Now if you're familiar with my earlier posts you'll know just what I'm talking about (if not - read 'To the Left, to the Left') But, and as I mentioned at the beginning (and while touching wood) all seems quiet down the way. Well okay, I've had a bit of a throbbing pain in my left tooth, but that's as bad as it's gotten - even today when the shit hit the fan. Now, said 'bother'
 didn't involve or have anything to do with me at all - I was just a spectator (for a change!) but whilst it was all goin on and tensions were running amok (mine weren't) I was peculiarly calm and stayed on the 'outside looking in and without feeling any of the usual stress that would usually have crept up by now.  I'm not used to this - all this having an 'oh dear' attitude and being oblivious to whatever the drama  - especially when en-route to Hormoneville. Normally other people's worries (at times) become mine - Especially loved ones. If a family member's upset or something I'm usually the first there to find out why, and ask if there's anything  I can do.